Broken
by 2kool4skool
Summary: Lulu runs to the only person she feels that she can trust. Dilu Complete!
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything to do with General Hospital.**

**A/N: This is my first GH fic. I have only been watching the show since September so I apologize if the characters don't seem themselves. I just needed something cathartic to write and this seemed like the perfect thing. I hope you enjoy.**

Broken

The pain was so strong, like the blade of a knife wedged between my ribs and penetrating my heart. I couldn't breathe, as I watched her slip away from me again. I couldn't watch this, or watch the pain on my brother's faces as they tried to stay strong. I ran from them and the truth that my mother was deserting us once more.

I don't know why I ran to him; why Dillon Quartermaine was the only person who made me feel safe. He looked at me, his eyes searching for an answer to the tears cascading down my face. I stared back at him, begging him to take the pain away and make it all stop. "Lulu," he said gently, his voice laced with concern.

I was drawn to him like a moth to a flame. I kissed him and surprisingly he didn't resist. Perhaps he could sense my raw need for closeness; for feeling. His lips caressed mine and my mind flashed back to all the times we'd kissed before. Nothing felt more right then being wrapped in his arms. I opened my mouth to him and his tongue found its way inside. I pressed my body against him. For a moment all the pain disappeared. I felt human again.

He laid me back onto the bed and reached for the hem of my shirt but then he stopped. "We shouldn't do this."

"Please Dillon, make it all go away."

He extricated himself from me and stood up. I felt cold from the lack of his body heat. "We can't do this again."

I broke down and sobbed as I listened to him reject me once more. For a moment, I wished I was pregnant again, tied to him by the child growing inside of me. I knew that was wrong; that wanting someone was not reason enough to bring a child into the world.

He sat down on the bed beside me. His hand stroked my hair. "What's going on Lulu?" His words were gentle; they washed over me like silk.

"My mother is slipping away. She won't be around much longer. She'll be back in Shadybrook within a couple of days."

I leaned into him, looking for the comfort only he could provide. He pressed his fingers into the muscles surrounding my spine. I absorbed his touch. "I'm sorry," he whispered softly.

I looked up at him, staring into his eyes. I needed him. He was the only one who could make the pain stop. I kissed him again, praying he wouldn't resist.

He didn't resist. His tongue caressed mine, as we struggled to gather air into our lungs. He leaned me back onto the bed and looked into my eyes. "Sleeping with me won't bring your mother back."

Tears spilled from my eyes and he wiped them away with his thumb. I reached for his arms and stroked my hands along them. "I need you." The words were hoarse as they escaped from my lips.

He kissed me gently. "I don't want to take advantage of you."

"You're the only real thing I've ever had Dillon. Please don't leave me too," I begged.

I imagined as he looked into my eyes that he could see my tormented soul, searching for answers in a world that kept beating me down. He ran his hand down my side and kissed me again. "I won't leave you."

**A/N: Please let me know if this is worth continuing or if it is better as a one shot. Thanks to anyone who took the time to read this.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything to do with General Hospital.**

**A/N: I was still debating on whether or not to continue this when I saw the atrocity that was the ending scene between Lulu and Dillon. WTF was that? They have a little more history than that awkward conversation gave them credit for. He could have at least hugged her. **

Broken

Chapter 2

The words he had spoken reiterated in the depths of my mind. "_I won't leave you_." What did he mean by that? That he wouldn't leave me alone tonight? Or forever? My hand slid up and cupped his face. His hand covered mine. "I'm scared Dillon," I whispered.

"I know Lulu. I know you are. I also know you are strong and can get through this."

"I don't want to lose my mom again." I cursed the tears that filled my eyes once more. He gently brushed them away.

"You can get through this." His words were gentle but firm. He gave me a small smile. I ached for him to take away the pain, ease my burdens and save me from losing my mother again.

I kissed him, this time with more urgency. He acquiesced and started to remove my shirt. Maybe it was wrong to sleep with him again, especially after everything that had happened between us but I couldn't stop. I didn't want to stop. I didn't just want him; I needed him. The loss of our child had forced a connection between us, one in which no one else could understand.

"Are you sure you want this?" he asked, his hands resting momentarily on the button of my jeans.

I nodded my head, never had I been more certain of something in my life.

XXXXX

I woke up to Dillon's steady breathing. My hand was clutching his, as I was spooned against his body. I had never felt so safe before in all of my life. I didn't want to leave the comfort of his arms.

The glow of the moon was omniscient as it permeated through his curtain. It enchanted me, evoking feelings of nostalgia that I could not place. I went to the window and looked at the Quartermaine estate. The moon danced across the property and I was taken by its beauty.

I thought of my mother and all she would lose when she slipped away. I pictured her back in her rocking chair. Losing my mother gave me a strong sense of loss that I feared I would never get used to. Loss was beginning to be a part of me. I pictured the baby I would never get to hold. I wondered if Dillon felt as empty as I did when he thought about the child he lost. It was a loss so painfully ours. It had connected us spiritually. The child we created was dead at my own selfish hands. I won't lie, I missed it everyday. The more babies I see, the more I realize what I had done. Dillon and I were not ready to be parents but a part of me wondered if we could have found a way to be, and to love our child, as the family neither of us ever had. I do believe that my decision would have been different if it weren't for Georgie or my lies. If Dillon and I had made our relationship work then perhaps we would be celebrating our child's birth and not its death.

I felt Dillon's presence before he slid his arms around my waist. I leaned into him and he rested his chin on my shoulder. "What are you doing up?"

"I just needed to think."

He spun me in his arms so that my eyes met his. I could see genuine concern in them. He reached his hand up and touched my face. "I'm so sorry," he whispered.

"Why are you being so nice to me?" I don't know what made me ask him that question but for some reason I needed to hear his answer.

"I care about you."

"How can you care about me? I killed our child," I sobbed. I tried to slide down to the floor but Dillon held me up.

"I understand Lulu. I understand why you did it. It was hard for me at first but I understand why."

"How can you? How can you understand me killing our child?"

"Because, you weren't ready to be a mom. I wasn't ready to be a dad."

"When our baby died, I felt like a part of me died along with it," I admitted, pulling myself from his arms and staring back out the window.

"You don't have to feel that way."

"I feel empty, less than human."

He folded me into his arms. "I feel it too," he said honestly. "But the decision has been made. We can't go back, only forward. You did the best thing for both of us. I see that now."

"I miss it," I said honestly. "I just want my mother," I sobbed. "How could my father have kept this from us? How could he have let me believe I had my mother back permanently?"

"It's unfair. You deserve to have your mother with you Lulu. I'm so sorry that she is leaving again but I can't answer for the things Luke does."

I felt myself reaching a breaking point. When did Dillon become my anchor? My rock? I leaned into him and he ran his hands up and down the bare flesh of my arms. He buried his face into my hair. "Come back to bed," he whispered.

Gently he lifted me from the floor and carried me back to his bed. I cuddled into him and he spooned me against his body. His arm wrapped itself protectively around me and his hand rested across my abdomen, something that did not go unnoticed. I pictured the baby that no longer existed and how hard I would have tried to take care of it. I pictured Dillon holding his baby. I knew Dillon heard the change in my breathing, it was apparent that I was crying.

He sat up and I rolled onto my back and looked up at him. He had tears in his own eyes. "I hate seeing you in this much pain," he said honestly.

"I have no where else to go," I admitted. "You're all, I feel, that I have left in this world."

I sat up beside him and stared into his eyes. He leaned in and kissed me again. The passion behind the kiss was something I had never experienced. It felt solid, safe, but filled with need on both sides.

XXXXX

"Dillon have you seen…AGAIN?"

My eyes opened to see Tracey standing in the doorway of Dillon's room. "Don't you knock?" Dillon shouted.

"I didn't realize I had to." I felt Dillon pull me in closer as if to protect me. "Lulu, your brother Nikolas is downstairs. He said he and Lucky had been looking for you all morning," she said tersely.

I waited for Tracey to close the door and then I pulled the covers off and found my clothes laying sporadically across Dillon's bedroom. Dillon grabbed my wrist before I left the room. He pulled me down to kiss him. I didn't want to leave him. When I was with him; I was momentarily able to forget that my mother was leaving me.

I made my way downstairs and could see Nikolas on his cell phone. "Yeah Lucky, I've got her. I'll bring her over right away."

His eyes met mine and the look in them terrified me. "What's going on?" I demanded.

Nikolas motioned for me to sit down. "Mom is getting worse and Robin has requested she is returned to Shadybrook. We have to say goodbye to her."

"No," I cried out. I had never felt my lungs feel so compressed with pain. "I'm not ready to say goodbye. I can't do it." I felt the hot tears spilling down my face.

Nikolas wrapped me into an embrace and I cried into his shoulder. "I need her."

"I know Lulu. This is going to be really hard but remember its going to be really hard for Mom too."

"I can't see her like this again."

"Yes you can. Just say goodbye Lulu. That's all you have to do. It may be the last time you speak with her."

I felt sick as I listened to Nikolas. I wanted to run, back to the safety of Dillon's arms, of his bed and never leave. Instead I nodded my head and allowed Nikolas to help me stand. He led me to the door and we went out to the car.

As we drove, I could see Nikolas looking at me, every few seconds, from the corner of my eye.

"So what were you doing at the Quartermaines?" he asked curiously.

"Getting advice from an old friend," I lied.

"Dillon?" he asked with a smile. I nodded.

He didn't say another word. If there was anything I could say about Nikolas, it's that he doesn't judge you. You are who you are and he loves you for it.

I could see Shadybrook approaching in the distance. I started to feel physically ill. "I'm scared," I admitted. He looked at me and then ruffled my hair with his hand.

"I know. We all are."

The gates loomed over us as Nikolas drove into the parking lot. I followed him up the steps and down the hallway to my mother's old room. As we arrived I could see her blonde hair as she sat in the rocking chair. The déjà vu made me shudder.

I made my way to her and she looked at me. She reached out and touched my face. "Bye Mom," I said, as more tears escaped from my eyes.

"Bye Lulu," she whispered. I could see her fading fast. Her eyes already held a distant look and I knew it wouldn't be long now.

I watched everyone say goodbye to her and then one by one we filed out of the room. "Lulu," my father called to me. I turned to look at him, but when I did, I was filled with rage.

"I hate you," I spat.

"Lulu," he called after me, but I had already broken into a run. I couldn't be near them anymore. I needed to get away, from everyone, to grieve the loss of my mother for the second time.

XXXXX

I don't know why I went there. The water glistened as I walked past. I opened the door to the boathouse and all my memories flooded back into my mind. I collapsed onto the ground as I was overtaken by the pain. I rocked back and forth, wishing to just slip away like my mother and be free of the pain that was haunting me.

I don't know how long I cried. I had no idea what time it was when the door to the boathouse opened. I didn't turn and look but I knew it was him. Dillon sunk down to the floor beside me. "I knew you'd be here."

I turned to look at him. I couldn't see him through the curtain of tears in my eyes. He gathered me in his arms and held me tightly against him. "I can't do this anymore," I cried to him. "I'm so tired of being in pain."

"I know," he said soothingly. "Your family called. They're really worried about you."

"I can't face them. I don't want to face any of them."

"You can't run from them Lulu. They love you."

"I love you." I didn't realize I'd even said it, until I saw the look on his face. "I'm sorry," I said right away.

Dillon leaned down and kissed me. "I love you too."

"What about Georgie?"

"What Georgie and I had can never compare to what you and I have. I tried to make it work with her. I thought I owed her that much, but it never will. I just don't love her like I used to."

I wanted to feel sorry for Georgie. I was responsible for ruining their marriage. I couldn't though because I needed Dillon more than she could ever understand. I was broken and I needed him to put me back together.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything to do with Crossing Jordan.**

**A/N: I apologize for this chapter. It's weak, I know. I meant to post it a while ago but I suffered a power outage. Sorry for the delay, but I hope you enjoy it anyway. **

Broken

Chapter 3

When I finally felt like I couldn't cry anymore, Dillon helped me stand up. He wrapped his arm around my waist and then led me toward the Quartermaine mansion. It loomed over us, shadowing everything below it from the moon light. I didn't want to go inside. I didn't want to face anyone.

As we reached the door I felt the urge to run away and escape but Dillon was already pulling it open. We stepped inside and I saw everyone turn to look at me. "Lulu," Emily said gently.

Then I noticed Nikolas. He stood up and came toward me. "We were really worried about you."

"I'm okay," I lied. "I'm just really tired." That wasn't a lie. I was exhausted, probably because I had never cried so much in my entire life.

"I have an idea," Nikolas said excitedly.

I made eye contact with him as he said this. "What's that?"

"How about you come home with me to Wyndemere tonight? I can have Alfred take care of us and we'll just hang out. I could even invite Lucky if you want?"

My eyes filled with tears. "So we can pretend to be a family again?"

I could see the tears that he tried to suppress. "It's what Mom would want."

"I think Mom would rather come out of her catatonic state," I started, feeling myself become overtaken by rage. Before I could say anything else the room went black.

I awoke in Dillon's arms as he carried me to the sofa. "What happened?" I asked.

"You fainted," he said, as he gently set me down. Nikolas looked terrified as he sat down beside me. Emily ran over. She pressed her hand to my forehead.

"When was the last time you ate?" Emily asked.

I thought about it. "I don't remember."

"Have you eaten at all today?"

"No," I admitted. "I don't remember the last time I ate something. I've had other things on my mind."

"I'll get you something to eat. How about saltines?" Emily asked.

The word saltines stuck out in my mind as I remembered Carly telling me to eat them for morning sickness. "No," I cried out. "I don't want saltines."

"I'll find something."

I looked over at Nikolas. "I want Mom."

He put his arm around me and pulled me tightly toward him. "I know Lulu. I want her too."

"It's not fair."

"I know. Believe me I know."

I was so tired of crying. "I just want to go to sleep," I muttered.

"Eat something first," he said, as Emily returned with pizza.

"Eat this," she ordered, setting it down in front of me.

"I'm not hungry," I moaned. The very idea of eating made my stomach churn.

"Lulu you have to eat something. Your blood sugar is all screwed up."

I wanted to resist again but I didn't have the energy. I put the greasy slice of pizza to my mouth and tried to take a bite of it. It felt like sand as it entered my mouth. Perhaps all of my crying had dehydrated me to the point I could no longer create saliva. I swallowed the dry lump and practically choked. I went to take another bite but I suddenly felt sick and dropped it onto the plate. "I don't want it."

The nausea got worse and suddenly I knew I was going to be sick. I ran to the door and threw myself outside. I made it to the lawn before everything came up. I couldn't stop choking as I threw up.

Emily reached me first and pulled my hair back. "It's okay," she soothed, rubbing her free hand up and down my back.

I sobbed when I finally finished emptying my stomach contents onto the grass. "You need to sleep," Emily said. "Come on, I'll take you to your bed."

We met Nikolas on the way back to the mansion and he told Emily he'd take me upstairs if she would get me some water.

As we reached my bed, Nikolas helped me onto the bed and covered me up. He sat down on the edge of the bed and stroked my hair. "I'll come back to check on you tomorrow. For now get some sleep."

Emily entered the room with a glass of juice, which she forced me to consume. I acquiesced and then I closed my eyes, succumbing to my exhaustion.

XXXXX

I recognized the blonde hair that cascaded down her back, set against the rocking chair. I approached her, hoping to see a real spark in her eyes again. Of course there wasn't one to be found. I reached out to touch her hand. As I made contact she dissipated to dust and blew away in the wind. "MOM," I screamed. "Mom come back. Please come back."

I woke up to Dillon's hand on my shoulder. "Lulu," he whispered. "Shh, it's just a nightmare."

I probably woke up everyone in the house but I didn't care. I felt sick again and Dillon followed me to the bathroom so that he could hold my hair back.

"No way, not again," Tracy said from the doorway. "I will not be responsible for enabling this."

"This doesn't concern you," Dillon spat.

"Like hell it doesn't. I am still married to her father. Therefore, that makes me her stepmother. Out Dillon."

"No," he warned.

"Do you want another aborted baby on your hands?" The venomous words spilled from her tongue and struck me hard. I pushed my way past them and started running out of the house.

"Enough," I could hear Dillon shouting. "Just because Luke hurt you, it doesn't give you the right to hurt Lulu."

I ran from the estate and kept running. I didn't know where to go. Wyndemere was too far away. I didn't know where Lucky was. I knew Carly wasn't home. I didn't want to bother Liz. I wanted nothing to do with my so called father. Then I decided there was one place I could go.

I arrived at my destination and slammed my hand into the door. After several minutes it opened. "Lulu?"

"How could you?" I screamed. "How could you bring her back just to take her away?"

"I'm really sorry." I watched Patrick leave the room. Robin dropped her head so that she wouldn't have to meet my gaze. "I know this is hard for you."

Robin's roommate Lainey stuck her head out of her bedroom door but Robin dismissed her.

"All I wanted was my mother," I sobbed. My cell phone started ringing and I flung it to the floor, watching it shatter into pieces.

"Lulu, you need to calm down," Robin said softly. "You're going to make yourself sick."

"Too late. I am sick; sick and tired of being abandoned by my parents."

She reached out and touched my arm but I shrugged her off. "You did this. You are responsible for taking her away again."

"I just thought…"

"WHAT? That I'd want to get my hopes up and then lose my mother all over again. That I would want to grieve for her when I'm already grieving the loss of my child," I screamed, anger surging through my body. "Why didn't you just leave her alone? Why did you do this?"

The angrier I got, the more lightheaded I began to feel. I recognized the feeling from before and there was nothing I could do as my world faded to black.

When I regained consciousness, Robin was on the phone and Patrick and Lainey were sitting beside me. "Lulu," Patrick said softly. I made eye contact with him. "You need to relax. I want you to drink this," he said, as Lainey handed me some apple juice.

"I can't," I warned. "I feel sick."

"You need sugar." I leaned my head back and closed my eyes. "Lulu," Patrick said, more firmly this time. "You have to drink this."

"I'm just going to throw it back up."

"That's okay. You're dehydrated and your blood sugar is out of whack."

I listened to him and accepted the juice. I was too tired to fight anyone any longer. I poured it into my mouth and swallowed. The acid was so strong it made me shudder.

Finally the last drop rolled from the bottom of the glass and I placed it onto the coffee table. I leaned my head back again and closed my eyes.

I awoke when I heard the knock at the door. Patrick opened it and I saw a very concerned Nikolas standing on the other side. "What happened to the Quartermaines?" he asked.

I shrugged my shoulders and tried to act indifferent to his presence. All I really wanted to do was run into my big brothers arms and let him comfort me.

He sat down beside me, his concern evident in the way he looked at me. "You've fainted twice today. You haven't eaten in days. You're throwing up. You need help dealing with this Lulu."

"I'll be fine." I'm not sure if that was for my benefit or for his.

"You're coming home with me. I won't hear any protest."

I smiled at him and wrapped my arms around him. I stood up and followed him toward the door. "Thanks," Nikolas said, as he waved to everyone in the room. I felt too guilty and embarrassed to say anything.

I climbed into the car and looked at Nikolas. "I'm sorry," I said softly.

"For what?"

"I seem to be a pain in the ass."

"You're not a pain in the ass. You're my sister and I love you."

"Why didn't he just tell us it was temporary? Why did he let us believe we had her back for good?"

"He wanted us to have the time with Mom that we should have. He's right, if we knew before, there would have been a black cloud hanging over us."

"Can I borrow your phone?"

"Yeah sure," he said, pulling it from his pocket.

I took it gently and dialed the number I had committed to memory. "Hello."

"Hey it's me."

"Lulu where are you?" Dillon asked. His voice resonated with panic.

"I'm with Nikolas. I'm going to stay at Wyndemere tonight."

"Are you all right?"

"What after I told off Robin and then fainted in her living room and had to have Patrick Drake look after me? Yeah I'm fine."

"I'm really sorry about my mom."

"Don't apologize for her. It's not your fault Dillon. I know she's just looking out for you. Maybe she's right."

"She is not right. I want to be with you, not because of the baby or because I'm worried about you. I love you Lulu and that, is why I want to be with you."

"I love you too," I whispered and watched as Nikolas pretended not to hear. "I'll call you tomorrow."

"Call me anytime you need me."

"Night Dillon."

"Night Lulu."

We reached the house and I followed Nikolas inside. He led me into the living room. "Would you like something to eat or drink?"

"I just want to go to bed."

"What happened tonight Lulu? What happened at the Quartermaines?"

"Tracy was just being her usual pleasant self," I said, trying to smile at him.

"What did she say?"

"It's not important. Don't worry about it."

"It obviously upset you. What did she say?" he prodded. Part of me wanted to scream at him and tell him to leave me alone, but another part of me wanted to curl up in my big brothers arms and let him comfort me, like my parents were supposed to.

"Please, just let it go."

"Lulu," he said softly. "Are you sure you don't want to talk about it?"

"Positive," I said, breathing a sigh of relief that he dropped it.

"Come on. I'll show you your room. You're welcome to stay with me as long as you like."

"Thanks Nikolas."

"No problem." He led me into the guest bedroom. "Call me if you need anything."

"Will do, but all I need right now is sleep."

"Good night Lulu."

"Good night Nikolas."


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything to do with General Hospital.**

**A/N: This story has become such an outlet for me. Thanks to everyone who is reading and enjoying it. It makes me happy to know that you guys appreciate it. I was extremely wary writing a fic for GH because I'm still learning the characters of this show. 3 months, and a roommate who has been watching for like 16 years, just doesn't give me enough perspective. Please let me know if my writing is out of character. I'm trying to stay as true to the characters as possible, from what I've seen since September. Please enjoy…**

Broken

Chapter 4

When I awoke the next morning, I came downstairs to find Nikolas standing in the living room holding Spencer. "Hey, how did you sleep?"

"Quite well actually," I said, as I came further into the room.

"I have to run into town and I can't find Colleen."

"I can watch him," I offered, motioning to my nephew.

"Are you sure? I can call Emily."

"You don't think I can handle it?"

"It's not that. I just know you've been having a rough time."

"I promise that I'll eat today."

"All right. Alfred's here if you need anything."

"We'll be fine," I said, as he placed Spencer into my arms.

"Thanks Lulu. I'll be back soon."

I smiled at him reassuringly and then sat down on the couch with Spencer. "Hey little guy," I cooed.

He smiled up at me; his eyes scanning my face. "I'm sorry," I said to him. He continued staring at me, listening intently to my soft words. "I should have given you a cousin. Instead I was selfish. How does somebody kill a baby and then get over it? Maybe I never will. I don't deserve Dillon, you know that? I killed our child, I destroyed his marriage and he's forgiven me."

"Maybe you need to forgive yourself." I looked up at Alfred standing in the doorway. "I was told you'd be having breakfast Ms. Spencer."

"I can make myself something."

"Nonsense, I'll whip up whatever you like."

"How about scrambled eggs and toast?"

"Excellent choice. I'll let you know when it is ready."

I smiled at him and turned my attention back to the cooing baby in my arms. "You're lucky to have such a wonderful father, who loves you unconditionally. I can't say I know what it feels like." Spencer gurgled and it made me smile. "I wish you could have gotten to know your grandmother. I wish I could have gotten to know your grandmother."

I stood up and placed Spencer onto a blanket on the floor. I grabbed some of his toys from his playpen and handed them to him. He clutched onto the fuzzy bear that I handed him and pulled it tightly against his chest. The innocence of this situation brought tears to my eyes as I thought about the fact that my baby would never get a chance to hold onto a teddy bear.

"Lulu," I turned to see Dillon standing in the doorway.

"Hey what are you doing here?" I said, unable to keep the smile from forming on my face.

"I just wanted to see how you were doing."

"I'm good. I'm babysitting," I said, pointing toward Spencer. He came further into the room and sat down on the floor beside me.

"Hey buddy," Dillon said to Spencer.

Spencer looked up at him and then toward me. Then he turned his attention back to his bear.

"He's cute."

"Isn't he?" I said, looking at my nephew with pride.

I lifted him from the floor and into my lap. "You're good with him."

The words hit me hard. "Yeah, too bad our baby is already dead."

"That's not what I meant Lulu."

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. It's just really hard every time I see a baby. Especially when that baby is my nephew."

"You did the right thing for both of us. We weren't ready."

"Well we'll never really know."

Dillon moved closer to me and I rested my head on his shoulder. Spencer watched us quietly and smiled. He was so adorable.

"I plan to talk to Georgie today," Dillon explained.

"What are you going to tell her?"

"That I love someone else."

"Don't you think that is a little harsh?" I asked.

"Well, it's the truth."

"Dillon, I love you but there is no way you can hurt Georgie like that."

"What are you saying?"

"You need to be more sensitive."

"What do you suggest?"

"I'm so glad you asked," I said with a smirk. "Tell her you feel that your relationship isn't working anymore and that things aren't like they used to be. That you both you need to move on. It's time to end things."

"Want to come?"'

"Not really. She might break my face."

"Yeah right."

He leaned down and claimed my lips with his. "I'll come by later," he offered. "Are you coming home tonight?"

"I think I'm going to stay with Nikolas for a while. I don't want to be a burden to your family any more."

"You're not a burden."

"Tell that to your mother and grandfather."

"They don't count for anything."

I smiled again. "Ms. Spencer, your breakfast is prepared," Alfred called.

"Thank you Alfred."

"I'll see you later Lulu."

"Later Dillon." As I watched him walk away, a large smile grew across my face.

I followed Alfred into the kitchen, clutching my nephew in my arms. I sat down at the table in front of my food and laughed as Spencer reached his arm out to touch my eggs. "Those aren't for you," I said gently. "You don't eat eggs yet."

The door opened and Emily came into the room. "Did Nikolas call you to check up on me?" I grumbled.

"No actually I came here looking for him. Is he here?"

"No, he ran into town."

"How are you feeling?"

"Better. I slept well and I'm eating again," I said cheerfully, pointing with my free hand at my food.

"That's good Lulu. I'm sorry for what my aunt said to you last night. Tracey can be…"

"Don't apologize for her please. It isn't your fault. I know she is just trying to protect Dillon."

"That is no excuse for speaking to you like that."

"I'm over it. She's right."

"She is not right."

"Look what happened last time Dillon and I got together."

"You were using defective condoms. It can happen to anyone."

"Yeah, but not everyone would have terminated the pregnancy."

"You can't keep blaming yourself Lulu. You were in a tough situation and you did what was best for you. No one can condemn you for making the best decision for yourself."

"Lucky can."

"Lucky was addicted to medication. He didn't know what he was doing."

"I see it in his eyes, every time he looks at me. I disappointed him."

"You did no such thing. You have disappointed no one, least of all your brothers. You know what, Elizabeth and I are going shopping today. Why don't you come with us?"

"I don't want to impose."

"You are not imposing on anyone. The three sisters in law will go out together for the day. It will be fun."

"Are you sure you want me to go with you?"

"Yes, we do. As soon as Nikolas gets home, we'll go to the mall."

"Are you sure Nikolas didn't send you?"

"Nope. I came of my own accord."

"Thanks Emily."

"I'll be here for you anytime." She embraced me. I was never happier that my brothers had found such kind women to marry. "Can I hold Spencer?" she asked as she pulled away.

"Of course," I said, as she lifted him from my arms. Giving me the perfect opportunity to eat my breakfast. I watched Emily cuddle him. It made me smile.

I finished my breakfast and then Emily and I went into the other room to play with Spencer.

"Hey what's going on?" Nikolas asked, as he came into the room about twenty minutes later.

"I just dropped by to talk to you before we went out," Emily explained.

"We?"

"Yeah, Lulu is coming out with Elizabeth and I, today."

"What time are you going to be home?"

"In time for that dinner you promised me," Emily said with a grin.

I lifted Spencer from the floor. "I'll give you guys a moment alone," I offered. Spencer gurgled again as I carried him from the room. "What do you think? You think Daddy and Emily are going to reconcile? So you can be one big happy family." He smiled at me again. "You'd like that wouldn't you? I bet you would?"

"What would he like?" Nikolas asked curiously.

"Nothing," I said with a grin. "Just a secret between his favourite aunt and himself."

"Is that so? Well as soon as he can talk, I'll get it out of him," Nikolas laughed, as he lifted Spencer from my arms.

"I'll see you later Nikolas."

"Bye Lulu. Bye Em."

"See you later," Emily said, as she waved back at him lethargically.

"So where are we going first?"

"Kelly's. That's where we are picking up Elizabeth."

I nodded my head and tried to swallow the bile rising in my throat, as I pictured walking in on Dillon breaking up with Georgie. "Excellent," I muttered.

When we finally arrived, I contemplated waiting in the car. "Come on, we should get drinks for the road," Emily said, waving for me to follow her.

"Crap," I muttered under my breath, as I followed her through the doors. I saw them out of the corner of my eye. Georgie had just sat down with him and placed her hand on top of his.

"Lulu," Elizabeth said cheerfully. "Are you going to join us?"

Elizabeth's outburst of my name gathered both Georgie and Dillon's attention. I just wanted the earth to open up and swallow me whole. "Yeah, if you don't mind," I responded, pretending I didn't notice them staring at me.

"Of course I don't mind. You're part of this family too."

"I have to be back in time for dinner with Nikolas," Emily said.

"I'm almost finished my drink," Elizabeth said, as she poured the glass of milk into her mouth.

"So Georgie, there is something we need to talk about," I heard Dillon say. "Look, this isn't working."

I wanted to run out of there. "Lulu, what are you having?" Emily asked.

I just wanted to die. "Orange juice please."

"Orange juice for her and coffee for me," Emily explained.

"What is going on Dillon?" Georgie asked.

Why doesn't the earth ever swallow you whole when you want it to?

"I think we should break up. It's not the same anymore. We need to move on." I heard Dillon's soft voice.

"Is this about Lulu?" I heard her demand.

"Not at all," I muttered to myself.

"This is about us. We aren't working. You know it's true," I could hear Dillon explain.

"YOU," Georgie shouted across the room. I turned in the direction of her loud voice. "This is your doing, isn't it?" she screamed.

"This is between you and Dillon," I said softly, feeling the urge to run away and as far as possible.

"Bull shit. You manipulated yourself right back into Dillon's life. That's what you do and Dillon falls for it every time. The victim routine."

"Dillon chose to be with me. I didn't do anything to provoke it, this time."

"You always do something to provoke it. You play off his concern for you. You make him feel sorry for you and he mistakes that pity for real feelings."

"Enough," I heard Dillon yell. "Leave Lulu alone."

"You bitch," she muttered. I went to run from the room but Emily and Elizabeth grabbed my arms.

"Come on Lulu. We'll take you out of here," both women said.

"You are just a stupid slut," I could hear Georgie screaming. "A slut that got pregnant and then killed her child because she couldn't live with her lies."

I can't explain the anger that came over me. I felt consumed by my rage. The abortion, my mother's relapse, my father's abandonment, everything exploded in that moment as my fist made contact with Georgie's face. I watched her fall backwards and then felt Emily and Elizabeth pull me from the room and toward the car.

"Lulu." I turned to see Dillon chasing after me. "I'm sorry you had to be there."

"We'll meet you in the car," the two women said, with a smile, as they walked away.

"I didn't mean to hit her. I swear I didn't."

"Hey, she forced you to do it. She had no right to say what she did."

"Yeah she did. I deserved what she said. I am the reason you guys are breaking up."

"No you're not. I don't love Georgie. I love you," he said, as he closed the space between us. I still felt so safe when I was wrapped up in his arms.

"I still shouldn't have hit her."

"Well, she shouldn't have said what she said. The good news is, she didn't break your face. You broke hers."

"That's funny," I muttered. Before I could say anything else his lips were on mine.

"So, what are you doing?"

"I am going out with my sisters in law. We're going shopping."

"What about later?"

"I think we can work something out."

"Excellent."

"How about dinner?"

"I think that sounds good. Meet me at the boathouse later?"

"What time?"

"7:00."

"I'll be there," I whispered. He kissed me once more and then let me go.

"Bye Dillon."

"Bye Lulu."

I climbed into the car and both women turned to look at me. "So what was that about?" they asked in unison.

"Long story."

"Good thing we have time," Emily said, with a laugh.

"It's not really a big deal."

"What's not? That you hit Georgie Jones or that you and Dillon are back together?" Elizabeth asked.

"See you already know the whole story."

"Ahh yes, but we don't know the details," Elizabeth said with a wink.


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything to do with General Hospital.**

**A/N: Can you believe how the writer's torture us? Stupid Georgie. I hate her. Friday's episode was so enjoyable and then today Georgie had to throw her little fit and still they have not broken up. I thought Sam was dumb but my god. How much longer are the writer's planning on dragging out the pathetic excuse for a relationship between Dillon and Georgie? I mean come on. He obviously loves Lulu. He obviously has more chemistry with Lulu. Even Spinelli noticed it. I guess I will just have to continue holding out hope that Dillon will come to his senses and realize he cares more for Lulu than just as a friend.**

Broken

Chapter 5

I tried to come up with the best way to explain my relationship with Dillon. I wasn't sure how to best put it into words. Before I had to say anything, Emily's cell phone started ringing.

"Hello," Emily said softly. I breathed a sigh of relief, hoping this distraction would distract them enough from their questions.

A few moments passed, as I listened to the soft blur of Emily's voice on her cell phone. My mind drifted to thoughts about Dillon and how horrible I felt about hitting Georgie. I hadn't wanted to hurt her. I had already felt enough guilt for splitting her and Dillon up over the summer. Now I felt bad for smashing my fist into her face.

"Lulu?" Emily called, pulling me from my thoughts.

"Yeah?"

"Nikolas wants to know if you had seen Colleen at all today?"

"No. I hadn't seen her once. Why?"

"No Nikolas, she hasn't seen her. What's going on?" I heard Emily say. "Lulu are you busy tonight?" Emily asked a few seconds later.

"What time?" I asked, thinking about my night with Dillon, something I didn't want to give up. When I was with him, the tight tense pain that had overtaken my chest ceased to exist. Each time he held me, I was momentarily able to forget about the baby I had killed and my mother who had slipped away from me once more.

"At 7:00."

"I was going to meet Dillon. I can cancel if you need me to baby-sit," I offered, wanting to help Nikolas as much as I could since he had taken me in.

"No, you don't need to cancel your plans," she responded.

"I can watch him," Elizabeth interrupted.

"Are you sure?" Emily asked with concern.

"He can come and hang around with Cameron and I for the night. I don't have anything planned and besides, it might be nice to get some experience with another baby around for Cameron to get used to."

"Where is Cameron?" I pondered aloud.

"Lucky took him out for the day. He felt guilty for everything that happened over the summer and he wanted to make it up to him," Elizabeth explained.

"That's nice," I said, smiling at the fact that my brother was getting a second chance at his marriage.

Emily hung up her phone and turned to Elizabeth. "Nikolas said thank you."

"It's no problem," Elizabeth explained. "I love any excuse to see Spencer."

"He is cute," I admitted.

"I wonder where Colleen has disappeared to," Emily said aloud.

"I'm sure she'll turn up," Elizabeth offered.

"She's really strange," Emily started saying.

"What do you mean?" I asked, feeling suddenly protective of my nephew.

"She has a big crush on Nikolas and she's always looking for an excuse to impress him. For her to disappear without notice is very out of character."

"I'm sure it's nothing," Elizabeth said dismissively. "Nikolas seems to trust her."

"True and he is pretty protective of Spencer."

"If she turns up, I'll keep my eye on her," I promised.

The conversation ended once we arrived at the mall. I followed both women out of the car and inside. We made our way into one of the first stores we came to. Unfortunately my extremely annoying professor was shopping at the same store. I hid behind Emily and Elizabeth, hoping he would disappear. I did not need to hear another one of his lectures.

"Ms. Spencer," he called, when he noticed me. I suddenly felt the same urge for the ground to open up and swallow me whole.

"What?" I grumbled, wishing I'd saved my anger at Georgie for his smug face.

"What happened to your assignment?"

"I had other things on my mind," I stated dismissively.

"What did you fall in love?" he asked condescendingly.

Elizabeth turned to look at him. "I'm sorry, who are you?" she asked coldly, obviously having picked up on my dislike for the greasy haired professor.

"My name is Pete Marquez. I'm her professor," he said, extending his hand.

Emily and Elizabeth eyed him suspiciously. "Do you have a reason to be so rude to your students?"

"Only the ones that don't hand in their assignments."

"Lulu had a reason," Emily started.

"No don't," I interrupted.

"What's that? Another dilemma that you feel the whole world should stop for?"

"Excuse me," Elizabeth interrupted. "You have no right to talk to her like that."

"I just want to know why my student doesn't ever take her work seriously," he explained, his eyes on me as he said this.

"It's none of your business," I muttered.

"Come on Ms. Spencer, enlighten me to your dilemma this time."

"She doesn't have to do anything," Emily said defensively.

"No, its okay. My mother slipped back into her catatonic state and will spend the rest of her life staring at a wall. My father abandoned me again. So, I guess I just didn't feel like doing one of your stupid assignments," I spat. I felt both Emily and Elizabeth place their hands on my back to comfort me.

I ignored his snide response and listened to Emily and Elizabeth tell him off. I pulled away. I didn't want to listen to his voice anymore. He was starting to grate on my nerves and I was afraid if I became enraged enough that I would either hit him, like I had Georgie or I would faint again, which would just be embarrassing.

I wished I still had my cell phone so I could hear Dillon's voice. He was always so calm when he talked to me. He was such a calming presence in my life.

I looked up to see where I had wandered and realized that I'd made my way to the baby section. I noticed a small cloth bib. I stared at the message written across it. _Grandma's Little Angel_. I don't know why it struck me, perhaps because I thought not only of the child that I'd lost but of my mother who would have been that child's grandmother. I thought about how when I have children, my mother won't be around to buy little bibs for my baby with little messages on them. I reached my hands out and touched the bib. Tears began burning in my eyes. I felt a hand on my shoulder and turned to see Carly standing there.

"Lulu, are you okay?" she asked.

"I'm all right. I'm fine," I lied.

"Are you sure? I heard Georgie Jones got hit in the face today," she said gently, concern resonating in her tone.

"I lost it for a moment," I admitted. "I'm really fine."

"Want to tell me what happened?" she prodded.

"She screamed at me. She called me a slut. She told me that Dillon didn't really care about me, but that he pitied me. She brought up the abortion and I just kind of lost it."

"Lulu there you are," Emily said, as her and Elizabeth came around the corner.

"Are you all right?" Elizabeth asked.

"I'm fine. Really."

"Lulu, he has no right to talk to you like that. You shouldn't have to put up with that," Emily started.

"Put up with what? What happened?" Carly asked.

"Lulu has this professor that is completely condescending. He was so rude to her," Elizabeth explained.

"It was practically harassment," Emily chimed in.

Carly turned to look at me with concern. "Guys I'm fine. Really. Don't worry about me."

Carly's cell phone started ringing and she turned away to answer it.

"So does anyone want lunch?" Emily asked.

"I could eat," I said, thankful that everyone had stopped focusing on my personal problems. I didn't want to worry about them, much less have other people worrying about them.

I waved goodbye to Carly and she waved back, but I knew she was not finished talking to me about how I was feeling.

The rest of the afternoon passed quickly. By five we had left the mall and were on our way back. "Lulu, where do you want to be dropped off?" Emily asked.

"At the Quartermaines if that isn't too much trouble."

"Not at all. I have to stop there to change anyway," she said, as she pulled into Kelly's so that Elizabeth could get her car.

"I'll meet you at Wyndemere at 7:00," Elizabeth said with a wave.

"Can you hold on a minute?" I requested.

Emily nodded and I climbed out of the car. I made my way inside Kelly's, wanting to apologize to Georgie for hitting her. "Hey Mike, is Georgie around?"

"No, she took the rest of the day off," he said gently. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," I told him, with a forced smile. I was disappointed that I'd have to wait to apologize. However, my worst nightmare entered the building just as I turned to leave.

"How could you?" Maxie spat, as she came toward me. "Not only did you break up their marriage, but as soon as they got back together, you just swoop in and take him away from her again. Then you have the nerve to hit her."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt her."

"You have a funny way of showing it," Maxie said venomously.

"I need to be somewhere."

"What someone else's life you're set to destroy?"

"You're one to talk. You sold my brother pills for sex. Somehow fell in love with him, all the while destroying his marriage. Then you tell everyone that you are pregnant, which has yet to be proven. Don't condemn me when you did exactly what I did."

"Do you even feel guilty?"

"Do you?"

"Lucky's marriage was already falling apart. He chose to be with me."

"Dillon chose to be with me."

"What? After you told him that Georgie had slept with Diego?" I tried to push my way past her but she blocked me. "Can't handle the truth, can you Lulu?" she asked viciously.

I needed to escape. "At least I didn't use my pregnancy to trap Dillon."

"Are you sure? Isn't that the only reason he is with you now? He feels guilty that he got you pregnant. He felt even guiltier when you suffered from the ramifications of your abortion. Then he was worried about you after your mother slipped back into her catatonic state. All that equates to is a lot of guilt and pity, which he has mistaken for love. I can't wait for that to fall apart for you Lulu. I hope it hurts more than it did for Georgie."

"I can say the same to you about Lucky," I said, before I threw her out of my way and back to Emily's car.

"Everything okay?" she asked, as I climbed inside.

"Everything's fine," I lied.

She nodded and we drove in silence to the Quartermaines. Everything that Georgie and Maxie had said to me, suddenly reiterated in my mind and I realized maybe Dillon didn't love me. Perhaps he did just pity me. That thought left a very empty void in the base of my stomach. I felt bile rising in my throat at the idea that I just might loose Dillon, the only stability that I had left.

Emily pulled into the driveway and we got out of the car. "Thank you for including me today," I said softly.

"Anytime Lulu," she said gently, as she placed her hand on my shoulder. "If you ever need anyone to talk to and don't want to talk to your brothers, know that I am here for you."

"Thank you," I said with a smile. I looked away before she could see the look of abandonment that I knew shone in my eyes.


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything to do with General Hospital.**

**A/N: Who else has been enjoying the Dilu scenes as of late? It's like the writers finally received my telepathic messages of putting Dilu back together. I hope they continue in this direction and finally break up Dillon and Georgie. Could a relationship be more boring? I think not! Anyway, enjoy. **

Broken

Chapter 6

I went up to my room and decided to change before meeting Dillon. As I emerged from the shower, wearing only my towel, I found Dillon lying on my bed. I smiled when I had realized that he had fallen asleep. I made sure my door was closed, before climbing on top of him and kissing him. Within a few seconds, he awoke and started kissing me back.

I pulled away and he held my gaze. A smile spread across his face. "I thought I was dreaming," he whispered.

I laughed. "Are you sure that you want me?" I asked, as I tried to get off of him.

He reached out and grabbed my wrist. "Of course I'm sure. I love you."

"How do you know that you're not going to realize that you love Georgie? Or that you only love me out of pity?"

"I don't pity you. I want to be with you. Don't listen to what Georgie said. She was just mad. None of it is true. I fell in love with you. I need you in my life. You make me feel complete." He pulled on my hand so that I collapsed back on top of him. Then he rolled over so that he was above me. "Trust me Lulu, I love you."

I smiled up at him. "If you want out, this is your last chance," I whispered.

"I don't need a chance to get out. I want you. I love you," he said before leaning down and kissing me. He pulled the towel off of me. "We won't be needing this," he said playfully.

I grinned as his warm hand slid up my cool body. I reached out and started to unbutton his shirt. He pulled his mouth from mine and started kissing my neck. I moaned and bucked against him. "You sure you want me?" he whispered against my ear.

"More than you'll ever know."

"Lulu," I heard Tracy shout from downstairs.

"What? Does she have radar for when we are together?" Dillon groaned.

"Would that even surprise you?" I asked, as he rolled off of me. I stood up and wrapped my arms around myself, cold without him.

"What does she even want?" he muttered.

"To ruin my life," I said with a grin. I pulled open a drawer and grabbed some clothes.

Dillon rebuttoned his shirt and followed me out of the room.

Tracy was waiting downstairs. "Lulu," she said coldly.

"What can I do for you?" I groaned.

"I heard some news today."

"Oh yeah and what might that be?"

"That you hit Georgie Jones in the face."

"But…"

"Look, I know that is appealing but she is the commissioner's daughter. She could charge you for assault."

"I didn't mean to do it. I lost it."

Dillon appeared behind me and slid his arms around my waist. "Georgie was being a bitch," he defended.

"I don't care Dillon. Lulu lives in this house and I will not have her bringing assault charges into it."

"Don't worry. I'm moving in with Nikolas," I muttered.

"Is that so?" Tracy asked tersely.

"Yes it is so."

"I want you to apologize to Georgie," she ordered.

"I've already tried. She wasn't at Kelly's," I defended.

"Well go over to her house then, before Mac finds out."

"But…"

"Just do it," she said sternly.

"I'll come with you," Dillon offered.

"It's okay Dillon. I'm a big girl. I can do it myself."

Dillon nodded and let go of me. Tracy leaned toward me. "I don't blame you for hitting her. We've all wanted to but…"

"I understand. I'll go over there now."

"Dillon, give Lulu a ride," Tracy ordered.

He nodded and followed me toward the door. "You don't have to do this," he said, as we reached the car.

"Yes, I do. She didn't deserve to be hit in the face," I said quietly. I still felt guilty for doing it. I remembered when Dillon had left me back in the summer. The pain had hurt so much, that at times it had hurt to take my next breath. If Georgie felt as I had, then I can't blame her for hating me.

Dillon looked at me as he was driving. "You're really quiet."

"I had a long day."

"Are you sure you're all right?"

"I'm fine."

"Did you have fun with Emily and Elizabeth?"

"Yeah," I said tiredly. "It was nice to get out."

He turned and looked at me. "There's something you're not telling me."

I turned to look at him and gave him a forced smile. "I'm fine," I reiterated.

"Don't lie to me."

"I miss my mom," I revealed. His hand reached over slid into mine.

"I know Lulu.

"You know my children aren't ever going to know their grandmother?"

"You can tell them all about her. Make them feel as if they knew her."

"I feel like if I move on, I'll be leaving my mother behind. I feel so guilty and torn."

"If there is one thing I know that your mother wants, it's for you to live your life to the fullest. She would not want her illness to hold you back."

"I know, but it's so hard to move on after finally having her around. I waited four years Dillon, and after less then a month she was taken from me again."

"It is completely unfair Lulu. I know how much having her around meant to you. I'm sorry that she's gone again. I wish I could do something to comfort you or take your pain away, but this is one time when all I can do, is sit by your side and hold your hand."

I turned my attention out the window, as Dillon's words reiterated in the depths of my conscious. "I guess I just keep clinging onto hope of a miracle. Robin gave me that hope again and then it was taken away, but I don't want to give it up. Having my mother back, gave me a sense that everything would work out. Now my life feels even more chaotic. I just can't accept that I won't ever hear her voice again, or see her smile. I won't ever see that spark in her eyes again. She's gone and so is my father. I feel like I'm right back to where I was four years ago. My life is just one vicious circle."

Dillon rubbed his fingers against my hand. "You aren't who you were four years ago. Maybe your father isn't here by your side but I am and so are Nikolas and Lucky. I know that none of us can ever replace your parents but we aren't going anywhere. We love you and we will help you through this in any way we can."

I turned my gaze back to him. "You don't know how much that means to me."

"You don't know how much you mean to me."

I smiled at him. "Thank you Dillon."

"I'll always be here for you."

Dillon hit the brakes and I looked to the front of Georgie's home. The home my mother grew up in. "Want me to come in?" Dillon asked gently.

"No, I'm a big girl. I can handle it. Besides, how nice would that be, if I brought you to rub it in her face?"

"I'll be waiting out here for you when you are done."

I nodded, inhaled deeply and then opened the door and made my way up the front steps. I knocked gently and was disappointed to see Mac answer the door. "Yes?" he muttered tersely.

"Can I please have a moment with Georgie?"

"I think you've said and done enough already Ms. Spencer," he said coldly.

I frowned and let my gaze drop to the ground. "Please just give me the opportunity to apologize?"

"I don't think Georgie wants to see you."

"I understand that, but I really would like to apologize to her."

"I'll ask her but I doubt she'll want to see you."

He disappeared inside and I waited nervously on the steps. I wrapped my arms around myself and remembered when Dillon told me I did that when I was alone, back in the summer. It made me smile. Suddenly the door reopened and I was met with Georgie's face, sporting a nasty bruise.

"What?" she asked coldly. "Come to rub it in my face some more?"

"I'm really sorry for hitting you. I lost it Georgie but that is no excuse. You did not deserve to be punched in the face."

"Why are you here?"

"To apologize."

"Or to gloat? You got Dillon, that's what you wanted all along right?"

"I didn't mean for it to happen this way."

"You know Lulu? I've always tried to understand you. I've always tried to be sympathetic to you because of the life you've led but you know what, you're not the only one that's father abandoned them. I don't get to see my mother either."

"At least your mother doesn't stare at a wall all day. If you wanted to talk to her, you could."

"You are just pathetic. You use your mother's illness to get what you want. Dillon feels sorry for you. At some point he will realize that and leave you. I can't wait for this to blow up in your face. I hope you enjoy it while you can."

"I didn't come here to fight. I just wanted to apologize for hitting you. I know what it feels like to lose someone you care about. I know how painful it is. I know how angry it makes you and I understand why you are lashing out at me. I'm sorry that you feel this way and I understand that I am partially responsible. I'm not however, responsible for Dillon falling out of love with you. That is between the two of you."

"We would still be together if you hadn't have lied back in the summer and ended up pregnant. Poor Lulu wins again. Poor Lulu killed her baby and she can't live with the repercussions. Dillon was always a sap for the girl that needed saving. You know what's going to happen, when he no longer needs to be your hero? He'll leave you and then you will understand what it feels like for me."

"Maybe I don't know how you feel but you don't know how it feels to be pregnant by a guy who loves someone else. You don't know what it's like to agonize over the decision of whether or not to let that child live. You don't know what it was like to know that Dillon wanted to be with you and that our child would never have the love from his father that he desired. You don't know what it was like to lie down on an exam table and have your child's life extinguished and to feel like a murderer afterward. I'm not a victim. I chose this fate for my baby but it doesn't make the pain any less real. Maybe the pregnancy changed Dillon but it changed me too. We are different people and that brought us together. I don't know whether Dillon and I will last, but for once in my life, I have someone who wants to be there for me and for once I want to let them. I'm sorry that it hurts you. I am, but there isn't anything I can do about that. I hope some day, you find love in your life that lasts forever and that you are eternally happy. I'm sorry it's not with Dillon but it's not. That's all I came to say. I'll see you around," I muttered as I attempted to turn and leave.

I didn't look back as I made my way to Dillon's car. I climbed into the passenger's seat and looked at him. "Was it horrible?" he asked delicately.

"It's sad. I feel bad for her. She is devastated."

"I know. I feel bad that I am responsible."

I reached out and took his hand. "I love you," I whispered.

"I love you too," he responded.


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything to do with General Hospital.**

**A/N: This chapter is not my best. I know that but I need it in here to set up where I want this story to end. I intend to only write 2 or 3 more chapters. Thanks again everyone for taking the time to read it. I really appreciate it. **

Broken

Chapter 7

Dillon put the car in the gear and started driving. "Where do you want to go?" I asked.

"We have a stop to make."

"Where?"

"The mall."

I arched my eyebrows and looked at him. "I just spent the better part of my day at the mall."

"I know but there is one thing you didn't buy."

"What was that?"

"You need to replace your cell phone. I don't like you not having one."

"What's the big deal?"

"I don't want you to ever get stuck in a situation where you need help and can't get it. Besides, I don't want to be denied hearing your voice when I want to. If you're living with Nikolas, you're getting a cell phone."

"All right, I won't argue."

He smiled at me. "Good."

"Though Dillon, I'd like to finish what we started," I said seductively.

I watched the corners of his mouth pull up. "I'd love to finish what we started. Right after we stop."

"You ever done it in a car?" I asked with a grin.

His face turned a shade of red. "I've always liked trying new things."

"Glad to hear it."

Dillon pulled into the mall parking lot. "First, let's get you that phone."

"Fair enough." I followed him out of the car. He pulled on my hand and pulled me against him. His lips met mine and he kissed me. I kissed him back. Finally he pulled away.

"Right after we get this phone."

"Sure you can resist?"

"No," he said, as his mouth crashed back against mine.

"Lucky for us, I can," I said, as I pulled away. I laughed as his jaw dropped open. "Let's get that phone," I said, as I bit on my lip to contain my laughter.

He followed me and we went inside. We stopped at the first kiosk that sold phones. The sales clerk approached us. "Can I help you?"

"We need a phone," Dillon exclaimed.

"Okay, what kind of phone?" the clerk asked.

"Just a phone. I don't care," I offered.

"This model here is really popular," the clerk said, as he pointed at a silver phone sitting in the display case.

"I like this one," I said as I picked it up. "What do you think Dillon?"

"It's perfect. We'll take it," he muttered.

"Don't you want to hear the sales pitch?" I asked with a smirk.

"Not really," he breathed against my neck. "I'd like to hear your sales pitch."

I laughed. "Okay we'll take it."

The clerk nodded and then turned to ring up the phone. I turned around in Dillon's arms. He smiled at me and brushed some hair from my face. Then he leaned in and kissed me.

We heard the sales clerk clear his throat a few seconds later. "Yes?" I muttered as I turned around to face him.

"How will you be paying for that?"

"Here," Dillon handed him a credit card.

"Thank you sir," he muttered. Dillon ignored him and turned to me.

Once we had the phone, we left the mall and went right back to the car. I climbed inside and looked at him, with a smile. "Well where should we go?" he asked.

"You're the driver. Where do you want to go?"

"All right, I'll pick a place," he said with a smirk.

He took us to a secluded area just outside of Port Charles and parked the car. We were pretty far down an old country road. We were quite positive, we would not be discovered. He climbed into the back seat and I followed suit. He pulled me toward him and kissed me again. His tongue caressed mine. His hands slid my shirt up and over my head. Then he tossed it to the front seat of the car. I laughed as my hands slowly unbuttoned his shirt, lingering on each button as torture.

Once undressed he leaned me back onto the seat. "You satisfied I love you?" he asked gently.

"I think so," I whispered. "Though I might need you to prove it one more time."

"That can be arranged," he whispered as his lips found my neck. I moaned and felt his mouth curl into a smile. "I won't leave you Lulu. I promise you."

"I love you Dillon," I whispered. He lifted his gaze to mine and then his mouth met mine once more.

He pulled away for only a moment. "I love you too Lulu. I swear to you, this is not pity. I want to be with you."

I smiled. "I trust you." With those final words between us we came together again. I had found happiness in my life and knew deep down, Dillon was already putting the pieces of my broken life back together.

XXXXX

We arrived back at the Quartermaines and he parked the car. I climbed out and started walking toward the mansion. "Whoa, where are you going?" he asked.

"Inside," I offered.

"Oh no, we have somewhere to be."

"Is that so?" I asked with curiousity.

"We were supposed to meet at the boathouse at 7:00 and it is now 7:30. We're late."

"For what?"

"Follow me."

"What are we late for?" I asked.

"I can't tell you. You're just going to have to trust me."

"All right. I trust you," I whispered.

He smiled and took my hand, leading me to the place where I had lost my virginity to the man that now had also taken my heart. He pulled open the door and dragged me inside. "What are we doing?" I asked, as he closed the door.

"This is the place where we began," he whispered.

I nodded and cocked my head to the side. "Uhuh…"

He lifted his hand and touched my face. "It's also the place where I held you while you fell apart."

"Okay…"

"This was the place where I fell in love with you."

I smiled. "Did you see this in a movie?"

He laughed. "Tonight this is a place where I want to start the rest of my life with you…"

I felt panic begin to rise in my chest. My hands began to sweat and my pulse raced. Where the hell was he going with this?

"Have dinner with me tonight?"

"Okay," I said weakly. He moved out of my way and I saw for the first time a small table littered with food and unlit candles. He pulled a lighter from his pocket and lit them. The room was soon lit with an incandescent glow.

"That's sweet Dillon, but what was with the speech?"

"I wanted to freak you out," he said with a smirk. "That and I also wanted you to know that I seriously love you with every fiber of my being."

I smiled at him. "That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me."

"Good," he whispered and then turned around to put on some music.

XXXXX

After we ate, he pulled me toward him and kissed me. We collapsed onto the mattresses that were lying on the floor. His tongue caressed mine in a battle for dominance and then the door opened and Tracy's voice filled the room. "For the love of…"

"Mom, what the hell?" Dillon shouted.

I laughed. "Still freak you out?" I asked with a smirk.

"This is not happening," she demanded.

"You think you can stop it?" Dillon asked, as he sat up.

"Yes darling, I do. You are not going to do this again."

"This isn't up to you," Dillon insisted. "We are adults and are capable of making our own decisions. You can't tell me what I can and cannot do; even if you are married to her father."

"Dillon she is your stepsister."

"Because you and Luke entered a sham of a marriage. We are no more siblings then Georgie and I. She was never raised as my sister. She has two brothers, Nikolas and Lucky. I am not her brother, nor do I ever plan on being her brother. Luke didn't marry you because he loved you… It was a scam…" Dillon said adamantly.

"Dillon, as long as there is a marriage certificate with mine and Luke's names on it, you and Lulu are not getting together. Since I don't plan on ever letting Luke get away with his "scam," as you call it, we're not getting a divorce. So this, is not happening…" she spat venomously.

"You don't control me," Dillon responded.

"I do control your inheritance. Want to be out on the street Dillon?"

"Yeah, I think I would. Rather than live with you," Dillon said icily.

"Fine, then leave…" she demanded.

Dillon stood up and helped me off of the ground. "I will. I'd rather live on the street before I let you control my life. I will not play your games this time. Lulu and I are together and there is nothing you can do about it."

I followed after him and hoped Tracy wouldn't kill me on the way by. Instead, I heard her break down into a hysterical fit of laughter, which I might add, kind of freaked me out.

"She's bluffing…" Dillon muttered.

We reached the car. "Where are you planning on going?"

"Anywhere but here. I can't handle this place anymore…"

"I don't want to be the reason that you give up your inheritance and your family…"

"You're not. My mother is. I choose you Lulu before I'd ever choose any of them. I want you and if they can't handle that, then that is their problem, not yours." He leaned in and kissed me, pressing my body against the car.

"Seriously though, where are you going?"

"Kelly's?"

"You're not living at Kelly's again."

"I don't really care where, Lulu."

We climbed into the car and he started driving. "Do you want me to return you to Wyndemere?"

"It's too early. Nikolas and Emily are having dinner together. I don't want to interrupt."

"All right then we'll find somewhere else."

"Such as?"

"Want to see a movie?"

"I'd love to see a movie," I said cheerfully.

XXXXX

After the movie Dillon followed me outside. "Are you ready to go back to Wyndemere?"

"Not until you tell me where you're planning to go."

"I'll find a place."

"I have an idea," I muttered. "If there is anyone that will understand the insanity of your family, she will."

"Who?"

"Now you'll have to trust me."

"I'll always trust you."

"Good, then let me drive."

He acquiesced and I climbed into the driver's seat.

We arrived at our destination and I turned to him with a smile. "Oh hell no…"

"Just for tonight. We'll figure something out tomorrow."

"I don't even think she likes me."

"Well she likes me, so she'll take you in."

"I don't think this is a good idea."

"Carly is not going to throw you out on the street."

"Why not?"

"Because I am her cousin and she promised to be there for me."

Dillon followed me, nervously, up the front steps. I knocked and within moments the door opened. Carly looked at me and then at Dillon. "What's going on?"

"Dillon was just kicked out…" I explained. "He needs a place to stay and as much as I'd love to ask Nikolas, he's busy this evening."

"So you're asking me?"

I nodded. "It's just for one night Carly, please?"

"What happened to get you kicked out?"

"Tracy doesn't approve of us…" I started.

"So she kicked you out?" she asked Dillon.

"And cut me off. I won't stay longer than I'm welcome and I'll understand if your answer is no."

"Hold on, I haven't said no." She dropped onto her couch. "How long?"

"Not long. I swear. I'll be gone as soon as I can."

"Well where are you going to go?"

"I don't know yet. I figured that I would worry about it tomorrow."

"You're welcome to stay here Dillon, as long as you need, or I can set you up in a room at the Metro Court, assuming you come up with an idea of what you plan on doing since you lost your inheritance."

"I don't want to be any trouble. If you don't mind my staying here tonight, then I will gladly accept."

"All right, you're welcome as long as you need to be here. Where are you staying?" she asked me.

"Nikolas'," I answered.

"I'll give you a ride over to the pier," Dillon offered.

He led me outside. "Thanks for this Lulu."

"I wasn't going to let you live on the street."

He dropped me off at the pier and kissed me good night. I watched him leave as the boat pulled away and smiled to myself because everything felt like it was finally going to be okay.


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything to do with General Hospital. **

**A/N: One more chapter after this. I can't believe it's almost over. Thanks for reading, I appreciate you all. **

Broken

Chapter 8

The next morning, I arrived at Carly's and found Dillon sitting on the couch playing a board game with Morgan and Michael. "Hey," I said when I came in the room.

"Hey," he responded.

"What are you boys doing?"

"Playing monopoly," Michael informed me.

I smiled. "That's really nice."

"We're almost done," Dillon explained.

"That's okay, take your time," I said, walking past them and into the kitchen, where I knew Carly was.

She turned to look at me. "Hey Lulu…"

"Can I ask your advice?"

She nodded. "Is it about your professor?"

I raised my eyebrows in confusion. "What about him?"

"Dillon and I were talking about him last night. Dillon says that his behaviour is borderline harassment."

"I can handle it. Don't worry about Marquez. He's not the first pain in my ass and he won't be the last."

Carly cocked her head to the side. "All right, it's up to you to handle him how you want. So what do you want advice on?"

"Dillon…"

"What about him?"

"I feel bad that he was kicked out over me."

"Why?"

"He's lost his inheritance and was kicked out of his home. I don't want to be the reason behind that."

"First of all, he chose to leave and second of all, he really loves you. I'm sure Tracy will come around. The Quartermaines like to be extreme but they usually stick together, for the most part. I'm sure they'll take him back. If not, you luck out. No awkward family dinners…"

I smiled again. "That does sound promising."

She smiled and wrapped her arms around my shoulders. "Don't sabotage this because you're scared. Dillon loves you and wants to be with you. So let him."

"You're right. You're definitely right."

I followed Carly into the living room. Dillon was helping the boys put the game away. "Okay boys, it's time to go to your Dad's. Are you guys ready?" Carly asked enthusiastically.

They both jumped up with excitement and raced to get their bags. I sat down on the couch beside Dillon, as Carly herded them toward the door. "I'll be back later," she said with a wave.

"Are you going to talk to your Mom today?" I asked delicately.

"Nope, if she wants to talk to me, she can find me."

"I don't think Carly's is the first place she'd look."

"I'm sure she'll find me eventually."

"Well in the meantime, I was wondering if you wouldn't mind accompanying me to Shady Brook."

"Sure," he said with concern. "Are you sure you're ready?"

"The longer I wait, the harder it will be. I'll stay in denial if I don't see that empty stare again. I need to understand that my mother is gone."

"Okay," he agreed. "I'll take you."

"Thank you."

XXXXX

We arrived at Shady Brook and I felt pain overtake my chest. My palms began to sweat and my heartbeat began to race. My stomach rolled with nausea and my lungs felt compressed. I tried, desperately, to pull air into my lungs and found myself collapse onto the ground in fear.

Dillon was by my side in seconds. He held me and calmly told me to breathe. "Slow, deep breaths Lulu. Come on, you have to calm down."

My head screamed at me to run, to never come back and witness her blank empty stare again. My chest ached and my lungs wheezed, from having no oxygen to work with. I began to feel faint. My body began to ache. "Breathe Lulu. Calm down and breathe."

I tried to listen to his gentle instructions but it only made the pain worsen. I felt absolutely terrified. "I… I can't do this," I sputtered.

He readjusted my body so that I was facing him. I looked into his eyes and I saw the fear flash through them, when his gaze met mine. "Lulu…" he said gently. I felt him lift me off of the ground and carry me inside, which only caused the pain to become even worse.

I attempted to slow my breathing but I could not. I needed oxygen and I didn't know how to get it. "Help," I heard Dillon's voice echo through the corridor and I could hear the tapping of feet as nurses ran to Dillon's aid.

"What is going on?" a nurse asked.

"She's suffering from an anxiety attack," Dillon exclaimed, fear resonating in his tone.

"Ma'am, you need to calm down," a nurse said firmly.

I tried again to slow my breathing and the pain became worse. "I'm going to die," I sobbed.

"You're not going to die. You are just hyperventilating. Calm down or I will have to sedate you," she said threateningly.

I made another attempt but I could not relax. I felt the pain in my arm and my world faded to black.

XXXXX

I opened my eyes and looked around the stark white room. Dillon was sitting in the chair beside the bed. "Lulu…" he said gently. "She's awake."

I looked around the room again and saw Lucky and Nikolas standing off to the side. "Lulu, how are you feeling?" Lucky asked, as he raced over to my side.

I looked at all three of the men in the room and then shut my eyes from the pain in my head. "I'm sorry," I cried.

"Lulu what's wrong? Why are you apologizing?" Nikolas asked.

"I just wanted to see Mom," I sobbed. I felt Dillon let go of my hand so that my brothers could move in on either side.

"We know Lulu," Lucky said gently.

"You don't have to be sorry," Nikolas said encouragingly.

"I'm sorry you had to come down here," I said sullenly.

"You're our little sister and we want to be here for you. I know that this is really hard on you but you don't have to face it alone," Nikolas assured me.

"It isn't your fault you had a panic attack. It happens. This is a really hard situation," Lucky agreed. "You have nothing to be sorry for."

"I don't want to be a problem for you."

"You are not a problem for us…" Nikolas exclaimed. "We are not here out of moral obligation. We love you. You are our family and we would never turn our backs on you. We will always be here for you, no matter what. We want to be there for you any time you need us."

"I promise you Lulu, I won't ever see you as a problem. You are a big part of us. No matter what, we will always love you," Lucky said gently.

"I miss Mom," I sobbed. Nikolas helped me sit up and then embraced me. After he let me go, Lucky hugged me.

"We all do, but we can all get through this. We will always have eachother," Nikolas promised.

I looked to the door and realized Dillon had left us alone. "Do you think we could go see Mom together?" I asked my brothers.

"Of course, as long as you're up to it," Lucky said.

"I am," I promised. They helped me stand up, but I felt faint so I sat back down.

"Maybe we should get a nurse?"

"I can walk. Just give me a second," I said.

I tried again and slowly made my way to the door. Dillon was standing in the hallway and I threw my arms around his shoulders. He wrapped his arms around me and held me against him. "Are you okay?" he asked gently.

"I will be. My brother's are going to take me to see my Mom."

Dillon nodded. "Do you want me to wait for you outside?"

"You can come with us," I offered.

"I don't want to intrude. Go with your brothers and I'll wait for you by the doors."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes," he said before kissing me gently.

I smiled when I pulled away and he wiped the tears off of my cheeks. He let me go and Lucky, Nikolas and I walked past him. They took me all the way to Mom's room. I stared at the closed door and imagined her smiling face from when we'd seen her awake for the first time. "I'm scared."

"It's going to be okay," Lucky said soothingly, as Nikolas pushed open the door. The three of us went inside and I stared at the back of my mother's head, terrified to look her in the eyes.

I made my way around her slowly and sat down on the bed. "Hi Mom," I said gently, ignoring the nausea I felt when she didn't respond to my voice.

Nikolas talked about Spencer and Lucky talked about his recovery and the baby. I listened to them and then I told her that I was staying with Nikolas and that Dillon and I were back together.

We spoke with her for about twenty minutes and then we decided to say good bye and turned to leave. I looked at her one last time, hoping for some life in her eyes again, but nothing happened. I had to accept that my mother was gone again, perhaps forever.

On our way out a nurse stopped us and said that I was welcome to leave, but that I needed to seek counseling and get help dealing with my mother's relapse. Both my brothers agreed and said they would set me up with a psychologist as soon as possible.

XXXXX

As the sun dipped behind the horizon, Dillon and I went to Kelly's. We went inside and I sat down at the table, while Dillon went to the counter to order some food.

"Hey Lulu," a familiar voice said timidly. I looked up at Georgie.

"Hi…" I said nervously.

"I wanted to talk to you for a moment, about our conversation yesterday."

"Okay…"

"I'm sorry for saying what I said."

"It's okay…"

"No it's not okay. I said some horrible things."

"I deserved it. I completely understand. I'm sure I would have said worse under similar circumstances."

"It doesn't give me the right to talk to you that way. You're right, Dillon chose to be with you and I'm glad you have someone there for you. I knew Dillon and I were drifting apart and I was just too afraid to let him go. I was mad at him, not you."

"Georgie you don't have to apologize…"

"Yes I do. You and Dillon are meant to be. He and I were nothing compared to the two of you. We had our time together and I will never regret it, but he never loved me the way he loves you. You guys are so much more then a couple, you're best friends. I'm envious but you deserve this. I know you've had a rough life and even more so with your mother as of late. I'm so sorry but I hope that this relationship with Dillon brings you the peace that you deserve."

"I don't know why you're so nice to me, but I really appreciate it. I'm sorry that you and Dillon didn't work out but you're going to find a guy that can give you what Dillon gives me. He'll find you and I hope he brings you the peace that you deserve."

She smiled at me. "I'll see you around?"

"Yeah, I'll see you around."

She left and Dillon came back to the table. "Is everything okay?" he asked with concern.

"She just apologized to me. We made peace…"

"I'm glad. I doubt you'll ever be friends but I'm happy that you could find peace with one another."

"Me too…"

"Dillon?" Tracy's surly voice echoed through Kelly's.

He looked at his mother. "What?"

"We need to talk," she muttered.

"About what?" he demanded.

"You; and what we discussed yesterday…"

"What, you kicking me out on the street because you can't accept my relationship with Lulu?" he asked coldly.

"Something like that," she said.

"I don't know; staying with Carly isn't so bad…"

"You're staying with Carly Corinthos?" Tracy spat.

"Yeah, she took me in when my own mother kicked me out," he explained. I smiled.

"Dillon…"

"Look mother, unless you accept my relationship with Lulu, I'm staying with Carly."

I watched her process what Dillon had said. Her emotions moved from anger, to frustration, to something I could not identify. "You are being ridiculous, fighting for a relationship that won't last with your step sister."

"Still not for you to decide," he muttered.

"Dillon, this won't last…"

"I think it will and even if it doesn't, it's none of your business."

I watched her hands squeeze into tight fists and watched as the veins in her neck began to protrude. "You are being ridiculous. I am only looking out for your best interests."

"You're looking out for your best interests. It's not about me, it's about controlling me. I'm not coming home until you accept my relationship with Lulu."

Tracy turned her head and glared at me. "Dillon, sweetheart, you're being impractical and unreasonable. I want you to have the best life possible. Do you understand that?"

"What I understand is that you are a control freak and want me to be at your every beck and call. I understand that you don't want me in a relationship with Lulu, but that is not for you to decide. I will choose who I love and I love Lulu."

Tracy groaned and rolled her eyes. "What will it take to make you move home?"

"Accept Lulu and I together."

"I am willing to look past it but I won't ever accept it, much less approve it. However, you have to move home."

"I don't know if I can agree to that. I won't want you breathing down our necks all of the time. Do you promise to leave us alone?"

"One on condition, you don't get her pregnant again." The words struck me hard and I pushed my chair away from the table and moved outside to get some air.

"That was nice Mom, real sensitive..." I heard Dillon mutter, as he threw his chair from the table and ran after me.

"Lulu…" he called, as he came outside.

I turned to look at him. "I'm sorry," I said gently. "I guess I'm still a little sensitive when it comes to the baby."

"It's okay. My mother doesn't think before she speaks," he said, folding me in his arms. "I'm sorry that she hurt you."

"She didn't hurt me. I chose to have the abortion and I have to live with it."

"You made the right decision. We weren't ready."

"I know. I do know that. I'm just… I don't know… It's just hard to move past it."

"Some day, when we're older and established, we'll be ready for a child but not now. We're still young and have so much left to do in our lives before we become parents. We never have to forget the baby, but we have to remember that it never would have had the life that it deserved."

"Maybe I shouldn't ever have kids. I'm damaged goods, not someone that should ever be anyone's mother," I said, as I pulled away from his arms.

"That is not true. You're hurt and you feel abandoned. Sometimes you're irrational and stubborn, but all that says, is that you are passionate. You are not damaged because everything that I just said, is what I love about you. This fire is the very soul of Lulu Spencer and I wouldn't trade it for the world. I love the way you are, even if sometimes it drives me crazy, I would never change it. You will be a good mother some day, just not yet."

I smiled at him. "Want to know what I love about you?"

"Always…" he said with a smirk.

"You're so understanding and you listen to me. You don't treat me like an inconvenience. You want to be in my life and share my pain, ease my burdens and make me smile. You know things about me that I don't know about myself. I love the quirkiness of your personality. I love the way you smile and I love the way you hold me, the way you make me feel safe and let me believe that everything will be okay."

He leaned down and kissed me and then held me against him. My head rested in the crook of his neck as tears spilled from my eyes, as I finally let go of the baby that I had killed.

A few moments later I heard Tracy clear her throat. "Yes mother," Dillon said coldly.

"All right fine Dillon. I will accept this and I will leave the two of you alone, but you are not sharing a room."

"I'm staying with Nikolas," I explained. "I think you should accept this deal with her," I said to Dillon.

"All right Mother, I'll agree to that, but if you say or do anything to try and break us up, I move back in with Carly."

"Fine…" Tracy said. I watched her bite her tongue. "Welcome home."


	9. Epilogue

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything to do with General Hospital. **

**A/N: This is it. I hope you like it. Thanks again and enjoy…**

Broken

Epilogue

It has been ten years since the day that Tracy allowed Dillon to move back home. Ten years since my mother's relapse and ten years since Lucky touched pills. It has been ten years since I had the abortion and ten years since Spencer's mother died.

Many changes occurred in the last ten years. Elizabeth and Lucky reconciled and finally had a child together. Her name is Laura Emily Spencer and she is six years old. Nikolas and Emily reconciled and had two children together, Lily Lu Cassadine and Edward Lucas Cassadine, ages six and four, respectively. Dillon and I stayed together, through college. We found out I was pregnant five years ago and now have a daughter, Riley Laura Quartermaine. I had refused to let her first name start with an 'L'. We have our own house, which Dillon had bought for us, so that we could be a family, separate from the Quartermaines. He still works for ELQ and I own my clothing store, one in which Dillon helped me start.

Ten years ago, when I had run into Dillon's arms, the night I knew my mother was leaving me again, I never expected that this would be the way my life turned out. I expected to break down and go crazy like my mom. I expected Dillon to abandon me after our night together. I had expected to be alone for the rest of my life and I am thankful, that is not how it turned out.

I love my life, even though my father has chosen to no longer be a part of it. The last time I saw him, Dillon and I were exchanging vows. That was six years ago. He has made his choice and I must respect it, even if it hurts.e He

My brothers have always remained by my side and I am thankful that they are such a huge part of my life.

I am pregnant again, and this time we are expecting our first son. Unfortunately Edward didn't live long enough to meet him, but he always saw Riley as his pride and joy. She was made soul heir of the Quartermaine fortune, which no one seemed to mind, and Tracy was ecstatic.

The last ten years have taught me many things, but mostly that life is what you make of it. I could have gone crazy and given up. I could have let the guilt of my abortion destroy my life. I could have let my childhood define me. I could have used my mother's relapse as an excuse to give up but I did not. I became who I wanted to be. I have found someone who has made my life worth living. I have moved beyond my broken childhood and my mother's broken mind. I have been able to put the broken pieces of my life back together and vow that my children will never understand what it feels like to be abandoned by their parents. I am happy and I can only look to the future with hope, because that is what I've learned, hope for the best and everything will work out just fine.


End file.
